I miss blogging. I miss the other dead bloggers too.

Well, dead may be a bit dramatic, but you know what I mean.

When I discovered the blogging community, it was exactly what I needed.  People like me, bearing their soul.  Talking about coming out.  Talking about hooking up.   All new to me.  All very exciting.

Then, I started hooking up.  Then I started blogging.  Then I felt like I wasn't alone. Then I could read a number of blogs, with real people writing them.  Real people reading them. Real people like me.  Now,  all gone.  Well, almost all gone.  There are one or two who occasionally pen a post.   I must say, I'm delighted that Mr. Steed has started posting again, and  I really enjoy the format.  He's opened his closet and released a skeleton or two.  But I digress.

Dang.  What a turn my life has taken!  Now married, half a year.  Still.  Happy.

But.....

I haven't given hooking up.

Hooking up definitely became more infrequent when Amigo entered my life.  For the most part, my sexual needs were met.  But the hook up was more than sex.  It was the thrill.  The hunt.  The chase.  The kill.  I know.  It's an addiction.  But I'm not ready to deal with it yet.

Then, ironically, about the time of our wedding, our sex life took a severe nose dive.  I wish I could elaborate.....it surely would be therapeutic for me,  but I can't.  Sharing my life on my blog is my choice, but sharing Amigos life with you would require his permission, and I'm not going to ask, because I would surely be denied.    I understand.

So, it's hard, wanting to unburden myself, but not being able to.  I'm a shit for hooking up while in a relationship, but trying to maintain a little integrity by not revealing too much about the Amigo.  My sweet husband.



So, yah.  I'm a little drunk.  I'm on my 6th beer, and it's my day off.  I've been wanting to write something for sooooooo long, but finally put my fingers to the keyboard tonight.  Thanks to the beer.

I guess I'm not really going to be able to organize my thoughts tonight to make a coherent post.  Grrrr.  Maybe if I touch on the subjects I WANT to write about, then later, I can explore them in depth.  Sure.  That will do.

I miss blogging.  I miss talking about hookups.  I'm up to 523.
I miss other bloggers, like Buddy Bear, Bi Crossing the Line, Two Lives, Cheating top and a dozen more.
I really like being married.  I love Amigo.  I so enjoy this and hope I don't fuck it up.
I want to talk about being judgmental.  How I thought love and sex were connected, and for me they are not.  Not at all.
I want to hear from all my old blogger buddies.  You know who you are.  I know who you are.
I would really love to share photos and stuff from my life, but that's not practical.

So, I just re-read what I wrote, and it's a bunch of drivel.  Oh well.  I'm going to publish it anyway.

On a more trivial note, I got in a nifty car accident in April.  I plowed into a lady at an intersection a block from my house.  I think I ran the red light, but I really don't know as I was either looking at my phone, or so zoned out that I didn't even see what happened.  I came back to reality when the air bag exploded in my face.  Fortunately, no one was injured seriously, and my insurance company really stepped up to the plate, and covered me and the lady that I hit.  Although not sexy, here are some photos!

Uneventful Update

I still hear from other bloggers and readers occasionally, and a couple times recently I've lamented over the fact that most, if not all of my favorite blogs have become lifeless.  Including mine.

I do understand that blogging it therapeutic to a troubled soul.  Once healed, the need for solace diminishes.

From my perspective, is it worth posting that things are going along fine?    Do people find that interesting?  Perhaps.  There are two or three other bloggers out there that I wish would send out an "All is good, I'm doing fine" signal, but alas, their blogs sit silent at the bottom of my blog feed.

So, how am I doing?  Well, pretty darn good.  I can't complain.  If I do, the Amigo reminds me, "Stop complaining, you have somebody that loves you."

He's right.

The project I was working on ended just before Christmas.  Amigo finish his school semester, and he and I drove to California on Christmas day.  Well, we drove halfway.  After doing battle with my snow blower, and a couple of other domestic issues, we left SLC by car Christmas afternoon.  I'm not sure how smart that was.  We got to St. George Utah, at 8PM on Christmas night, and we were starving.  I did not count on everything being closed.  I guess I've never ventured out to find food on Christmas day before, despite being 54 years old.  Even Burger King and KFC are closed.  I guess it makes sense, but I had just never given it any thought before.

Our Christmas Dinner of 2016 consisted of Gas Station sandwiches.

We arrived in Southern California Monday afternoon, and met my Mom and Sister at my Mom's new house.  She just moved last summer, and is in a state of remodel/construction, and could not put us up.  Sis to the rescue.

We went to dinner at a restaurant, and in the parking lot, before we came in, I told my Mom, that I wanted her to open her present first.  She unwrapped the paper to find a thin tin box.  Inside the box, were a couple dozen photos, of my courthouse wedding ceremony.

"Congratulations!  For Christmas this year, I'm giving you a Son-in-law!"

Mom almost fell over.  He jaw dropped and the color drained from her face.  Yes, she was happy.  Surprised but happy!

The next day, after spending the night at my Sister's house, we ventured to my Dad's house, and delivered that same news.  He and my step mom were also happy, but they didn't go crazy like my Mom did.

We spent 10 days at my sister's small townhouse condo.  Even Mom joined us most of the time, as her contractor wanted her out of the house while the tradespeople did their work.  We did a bunch of touristy stuff, and had a nice time.   We arrived home the 8th of January exactly two weeks later.

Neither of us is working, and Amigo is taking the semester off school.  This means that we have been side by side 24/7 now for about 5 weeks.  It's been good, but one of us needs to get a job......soon!

Amigo and I tried going to a gay bar last weekend.

I invited a friend/coworker over for dinner.  Mexican food, of course.  Amigo asked him where we could go.  We both wanted to try a gay bar, and Amigo wanted to dance.  Actually there is a gay bar in my neighborhood, only a mile or two from my house, so we went there.

My friend had warned us that things don't really get going until late at night, but I am an early person.  I go to bed at 10, usually, and wake at 5:30.  Nonetheless, we ventured out to the bar, arriving about 8:30.  I was not prepared to see the place empty, but it was.  There were two other guys at the bar, and a guy and a girl (?) at a table looking at things on a laptop computer.  The place was dead.

I ordered a liter of beer for me, and a liter of lemonade for the Amigo, and we nursed our drinks for the next hour, and threw in the towel at 9:45.  What a couple of party animals!  Amigo kind of wanted to stay, and he still would like to go back.  I guess he used to frequent the discos back in Mexico in his 30s.  I wish I had the desire to entertain his enthusiasm, but I just don't.  It would be nice if he had a friend here that he could go out with.  Unfortunately, his school is in another county, and that's where all his friends are, and they don't know his secret anyway.

So, that's the long and boring update.  I've been married a month and a half  and life really hasn't changed all that much for me.  I've enjoyed my break and now it's time to get back to work.  I'm not exactly sure when that might be however.

As I write this it's still dark outside.  Dark and snowing like crazy.  Looks like the snowblower and I will do battle again today.