Dude #112: Gag reflex

Dude #112 was a stupid time wasting fucker.

If I was a violent guy,  I'd kick his ass.  Okay, maybe not but he still pissed me off.

Sunday morning and I posted for someone to suck me off.  After an hour of no response, a few started coming in.  I finally settled on this guy.

"Hi, I'm 48m in slc area, and interested in giving you a nice bj.  I'm pretty inexperienced with other guys, but have tried this on two occasions, and was able to completely swallow the sperm.  I'd like to do that again, and enjoy having you release in my mouth after a big buildup.  I'm 5'8", wear a 38w pant, have blonde hair with some grey and a mustache.  No reciprocation necessary, let's just help you out with that hard penis.  Not able to host, let me know if interested."

A quick search of my past e-mails revealed he had responded to my posts before, but we never put it together....too far away, or not enough time, or another guy beat him to the punch.


So, he agrees to come over, and he shows up, comes in.  I drop my pants and sit on the couch and he kneels in front of me and sucks me for about two minutes, then starts jacking me off, with such a rapid stroke, it felt like a vibrator.  I moved his hand away, indicating more mouth, less hand, and he sucked me a minute more, before pulling off.

I thought maybe he didn't like having to lean over, so I stood and gently fucked his mouth, and he took it, but kind of gagged a few times.  I pulled out to let him catch his breath, and he looked like he was having second thoughts or going to get sick or something.

He said he wasn't digging it.

I can't remember the exact words, but it was awkward, and I couldn't figure out what his deal was.  He just remained there on his knees, kind of staring.  Finally, he said something and I pulled on my boxers, and almost said "get the fuck out", but he was stumbling for words, and I just said "good-bye" and pointed to the door.  He was all apologies as he backed out and fled.

Later I googled his e-mail address.  He also is a minister who will perform wedding ceremonies dressed as Elvis.   There were even photos of him in Elvis costume.  I'm so very tempted to post them.....but I won't.

WTF?  Could my life get any more bizarre?