Dude 442. Nice NSA morning head.

I guess this post should be more about why I hooked up this morning.

And, should I feel guilty?  If not, why?

The Amigo is out of town.  We knew we couldn't be together this weekend.  I've been jacking off almost daily, mostly because I have time but also, because I knew Amigo wasn't going to be around, and so I had nothing to "save up" for.

First.  The hookup.  Let's get that out of the way.  Then I'll deal with the shame, or guilt, or lack of it.

It's Saturday.  I woke up and looked at porn and drank my coffee, just like every other morning.  Then, I hit the gym.  I turned on Grindr, for two reasons.  To see if the handsome twenty-something hairy otter kid had sent me a message, (we've been messaging for weeks) and secondly, when I'm at the gym, I'm in somewhat new territory, so I might appear to some to be fresh meat.  It's fun to get hit on, even if I have no intentions of getting together.

Did I have intentions of getting together?

Well, I'm not interested in meeting anyone else for coffee, or a beer.

The romantic, emotional void that I had is totally fulfilled by Amigo.  He's not everything I had hoped for, but he's pretty good and I certainly don't have a desire to look for something else along those lines right now.

Sexually, well, I'm still horny.

I'm trying to figure out all that part as well.  I'm not sure if I'll ever be sexually satisfied by one guy again.  I was alone and celibate for so long.  Then, bam, I discovered the NSA hook up and I was like a kid in a candy store.....for the last 6 years!

And, then just as quickly, bam!  I start dating Amigo, and the hookups cease.

I'm still figuring it out.

But where was I?  Oh yah, back to this morning's hookup.

So, I have Grindr on, and a 21 year old Latino kid hits me up.  Very polite, and he exchange pleasantries, then he says "What are you up to this morning."

I told him I was looking for some dick to suck.  He said "I'm looking for the same."

Well, how much easier could it have been?  I'm horny and there's a handsome 21 year old Latino boy who's offering to suck my cock.  We exchange a few more details; He's STD free, he's HIV negative, He'll let me cum in his mouth, and he's free now.  He even wants me to come now instead of taking a shower first, knowing I'm coming from the gym.

So, I show up at a nice house on the east side of SLC.  He's got a room in the basement.  I get the idea he's some kind of exchange student or something, and we chat a little about that.

His profile doesn't give many stats, but had a nice picture of him.  In person, he's not nearly as tall as I thought, maybe 5'4".  He's about 150 or 160, so not fat, but not skinny.  From his photo, I didn't expect that he was slender anyway.

Once in his room I quickly shuck my sweatpants, gym shorts and Dr. Suess Grinch boxer shorts.

He gives a pretty good BJ.  I'd give it a 7 out of 10.  He want's to kiss, but I decline.

"Why?"  he asks.

I lie and tell him I don't like kissing guys.

"But you let them suck your dick?" he asks.

Truth is, I'm still a bit old fashioned about kissing.  To me, kissing is romance.  It's attraction.  It's affection.  It's not part of NSA sex.  NSA sex, to me is all about the sucking or the fucking.

That's not to say, I haven't been caught up in the heat of NSA sex, and been all fired up and sucked into a passionate fiery mack session, because I surely have.

I told the kid he could kiss my neck if he wanted, and indeed he did.  He gave me great head.  He pulled my shirt off, and and lay on top of me and kissed my neck, hairy chest and went back to sucking me.

When I made a grab for his hard dick, obviously stiff in his flannel pajama type lounge pants, he warned me, "be careful, because I cum fast......"

I quit fumbling for his dick, as I didn't want him cumming and then calling the whole thing off.

True to my being, after 15 minutes of sucking and playing around, I felt my orgasm building and told the kid about it.  He stayed on task and as I was about to explode, I clamped down on his head, he pulled one hand free and jammed his finger in my mouth.

In the heat of orgasm, I had to fight the urge to bite down hard, but I was mainly focused on my cum spurting into his hot mouth, as he mercilessly milked me with is tongue.

When I came back to earth and caught my breath, I released him and I could tell he had my gob still in his mouth.  I told him if he needed to spit, it was fine with me and he left the room for a minute.

I put my gym clothes back on and when he returned his boner was still tenting out his lounge pants but now there was the addition of a huge wet spot.  I'm not sure if he cummed, or whether it was just pre-cum.  Either way, it spoke to me more than words that the kid enjoyed himself too.  Even if he didn't cum, he could jack off to the fresh memory, and maybe event he fresh taste of my jizz that he just spit out.

So, where does that leave me?

I don't know.

I'd love to share this with Amigo, but I know he wouldn't want to hear it.  I'm resigned to tell him the truth if he asks.

I also debated about writing about it.

To my readers, many of whom have reached out to me in comments and e-mails, I kind of didn't want to disappoint you by appearing to back slide, but again, I feel that honesty, with you, and especially with myself, might be critical at this point of my journey.

So, there you have it.  Did I stumble or am I back on the hook up path?  Time will tell.